Open Letter to Sisterhood
by Tammy J Fischer Labey
March 9th, 2008
Hey Sis, thanks for the email .........it was about 11pm before I had the chance to read it; after
staying up until 3 am the night before--writing a critical executive summary for a new project that
I won't be working on--not because I am a woman, but because as a woman, I had not found my
way under the wing of a mentor positioned to navigate the political waters key to a successful
business career.
And if you think about it, a woman in the work force walks a very fine line between avoiding
sexual harassment and establishing a relationship w/a male mentor. So even though there are
now plenty of women in business, it occurs to me I may have finally found the glass ceiling as a
consultant for lack of suitable mentors—which exponentially becomes a more heavily dominated
male pool the closer you get to the top. You're right, sis: we must work many times harder than
our male colleagues to realize success in corporate America. Anyway, long story short, I called
my favorite recruiter to let him know I would be available at the end of this month when my
contract expires and accepted another offer the following week.
REWIND.
The new offer came w/a raise that puts me at the top of my field; not bad for someone who
started working as an 11 year old babysitter of three kids for 50 cents an hour. Trying to find
my way in a corporate world just opening itself up to taking professional women seriously, I
flipped burgers thru high school, bounced around in college for a few years (waiting tables after
class) before getting married a couple credits shy of a degree—only to return to the workforce,
landing an analyst position as a 30 year old-soon to be single mom having a major meltdown
ten years later.
FAST FORWARD.
So I s/b happy about this latest opportunity and I am truly appreciative the stars lined up in my
favor at a time when so many people are paying their mortgage on credit cards w/double digit
interest rates. But while I remind myself often that I am well paid for my contributions, so are my
male colleagues—many of whom can't/don't honestly hold a candle to what I deliver.
As a child of the sixties, I decided a long time ago that was a fact of life and if I let it make me
bitter I wouldn't be able to a) love a man in my personal life and b) effectively work w/men
critical to success. So I had actually put the whole equal opportunity issue out of my head until
reading our timely note for which I want to thank you: It reminded me that nothing is “wrong
w/me” that a sex change couldn’t fix:) It was such a relief to stop obsessing over what I could
have “done differently” that there were tears of joy in my grief.
Anyway............I nailed the executive summary. Before sending it to the execs I needed to get
"buy in" from my team. So I set up a meeting to get consensus. I started the meeting promptly at
4pm and got about 1/2 way thru the analysis when my male counterpart started fidgeting and
then interrupted me asking me if I could "just scroll down to the bottom line" because, "no
offense" but he needed to leave the office at 5pm sharp. I zipped thru the rest of my carefully
structured scope definition, risk assessment, milestones, next steps, etc etc where upon he
announced "GREAT JOB, kiddo: gotta run.” It was 4:59pm.
Three minutes later on his way out the door, my collegaue stopped by my office to tell me one
more time what a great job I did and how much it was "appreciated." So I asked him if he had a
dinner obligation or something that he needed to leave at 5pm sharp. He said not really, it was
just that his wife didn’t like it when he got home late because it left little time to spend w/their
kids before bedtime. Empathizing w/both my colleague and his wife, I told him I understood and
wished him a nice evening. He grinned, winked and breezed his 6'4" frame out the door.
Ever the ostensible martyr, I stayed laboring over the detail of my summary report another 2.5
hours before sending it out and then headed out the door myself. In reality, it never even
occurred to me how tired I was because I was so intent on "getting it right" as a perfectionist.
Yet it is my male colleague who likely fill the role I aspired to—possibly even taking it w/him to a
new department where he can share w/his beer buddies. But that's politics. Hey, it’s a guy
thing! It hurt, but not bad enough to throw in the towel. I wanted the closure; and I will keep the
(sanitized) artifact in my portfolio for future reference:)
And I keep thinking if I just work hard enough and get it right, I'll get that dream job—
because I'm...scrappy—like Hillary.
Except: I was never able to bring myself to compromise my values for the backstabbing, grand
standing, misleading statements, disingenuous arguments, smearing good people's hard
earned reputations, dismissing significant contributions of competitors w/misrepresentations
and/or half truths—whatever it takes—to get there. We all know plenty of both men and women
who feel the end justifies the means; and really do not care how much blood they leave on the
floor in order to advance themselves.
Since it’s (frankly) not in my nature to retaliate and tear into these women or men, I just work
harder to “Change” the rules: On my own terms. In doing so, I like to think I am setting an
example others will follow. Sometimes, every now then, I even see a pay off—enough to give me
hope I am not alone in my veracity, and keep on trucking.
And then, once in a lifetime, someone comes along and expresses those same values w/such
eloquence that millions of people listen and follow the lead.This person in our lifetime, of
course, is Barack Obama. An idealist, he refuses to fight dirty.
Yes! We are good people w/good intentions who can and will play by God's rules to do
good things!
Even if that means losing the election--which, after Tuesday in Pennsylvania, became a
possibility; despite the fact that Obama will go into the DNC convention w/at least 150 more
delegates than Clinton. Everyone knows the Clinton Machine has already begun twisting arms
behind closed doors even as Hillary and her lovely daughter, Chelsea smile for the cameras. In
fact Hillary is running two campaigns, one above ground, the other below, at the same time
w/her husband moving behind the scenes for the less…palatable stuff, looking for sniper
positions.
But don’t look there, look over here; at Hillary! See how she beams at winning four great big
more delegates than Barack out of 360 delegates at stake in a four state primary! Bring your
daughters to see history in the making. Little girls can grow up to be president! Just don’t look
behind the curtain to see the dark side of ‘whatever it takes’ to make it happen. Don’t mind the
special interests lobbying the news executives to soften their focus on Hillary’s tax returns. Don’
t be distracted by those inspiring speeches making you feel good about your country again.
And above all don’t pay attention to the numbers, they will “sort themselves out,” albeit behind
closed doors by a few hundred super delegates indebted to corporate interests.
Don’t vote for me because I’m a woman. Vote for me because I’m a WOMAN.
Are you confused? Is it any wonder? Do you seek clarity? It’s almost as if, The Clintons, Bill and
Hillary, have somehow managed to bring doublespeak back into vogue even as they espouse
Change. The dynamic duo is fast becoming the two headed monster in my mind. As one who
started this primary season wanting to see either Hillary or Barack in office come January 2009,
I find myself donating money to the Obama campaign almost on a weekly basis these days in
an effort to make the Clintons “go away” once and for all. (I’m even starting to wonder just what
happened to those House Republicans that made them so badly want to exploit the Monica
Lewinsky affair in their insanely focused determination to destroy Bill Clinton.) BTW what ever
happened to those House Republicans, and where are they when you need them?
And now the Florida Republican Governor is concerned about “disenfranchised” voters
in the Democratic primary—ostensibly because they reside in his state?
Doesn’t anyone else smell a rat here? Certainly not the media so busy trying to prove they are
being “fair” to Hillary, they miss the basic questions:
play, doesn’t it follow that voters in all 50 states are “disenfranchised” when the primary moves
into the inevitable brokered convention??? Talk about having your cake and eating it too!
Look over there at Hillary in Ohio! (Where the Bush administration stole the election in 2004.)
There she is grandstanding her way to the White House, tromping over the “little states”
standing for Change: In values. To wit, notice how Chelsea has replaced Bill at Hillary's side in
a brilliant, carefully crafted move to create the perception Hillary's campaign is about sisterhood.
Make no mistake: In the land of Clintons this election is not about sisterhood; It is about
Hillary's career and the Clinton legacy.
No matter how much blood is left on the floor or what the price tag to the special interest
lobbyists (ie: corporate America) to whom she is indebted, Hillary feels (strongly) entitled to the
job--even if there is a better (wo)man who is much more adept at working effectively to get
things done through the use of words—as opposed to bullets—on good people's terms. That’s
not sisterhood. It’s raw, egotistical ambition for a prize. We’ve had a bellyful. Get it? That’s what
this Change thing is about. Black, White, Yellow, Red: Gay, Bisexual, Short, Tall, Skinny Fat,
Young, Old, Male, Female.
Integrity trumps all this election—note how quickly the republicans got the message
during the primaries?
The Clintons are simply not trustworthy: either together standing side by side or each standing
on their own two feet in two different states at the same time. I’m sorry to call it like I see it, but
we’ve all seen enough to recognize these folks can’t even trust each other, what kind of
arrogance suggests we should trust either of them in a Hillary Clinton administration? Especially
one willing to spend our precious resources (ie: time/money/energy) on playing w/words in an
attempt to confuse the issues, obscure the truth, put forth evocative imagery…say one thing
and do another, shake your head yes and say no all at the same time. Sound familiar? It doesn’
t sound like Change to me. It sounds like same ole same ole duplicitous politics.
Not. This. Time: We will not have yet another election stolen by corporate America. Now
is the time for all good men and women to come to the aid of their country.
The thing is this guy, Barack Obama, understands the end does not always justify the means.
He knows his integrity may cost him the job; he also knows the next president must get there on
the people’s terms, indebted to no one but the people, in order to be effective. Just because he
refuses to fight dirty does not mean he refuses to fight. And people, millions of people, are
counting on Barack Obama to fight the good fight—in the light, above ground, where everyone
can see how it’s done—for that core American value: Do unto others as you would have them
do unto you.
As a born again agnostic, I pray God he can find a way.
Americans know right from wrong; we know truth when we see it and we know the road back to
respect cannot be littered w/Hillary’s broken dishes. But Hillary’s kitchen sink threatens to
destroy anyone in her way, even if that person might be the last chance this country has to get
it right. That is just wrong.
Your beautiful little girls deserve a better role model, dear sister, than Hillary’s trail of dirty
laundry can provide; and as luck would have it, they have one—in you.
by Tammy J Fischer Labey
March 9th, 2008
Hey Sis, thanks for the email .........it was about 11pm before I had the chance to read it; after
staying up until 3 am the night before--writing a critical executive summary for a new project that
I won't be working on--not because I am a woman, but because as a woman, I had not found my
way under the wing of a mentor positioned to navigate the political waters key to a successful
business career.
And if you think about it, a woman in the work force walks a very fine line between avoiding
sexual harassment and establishing a relationship w/a male mentor. So even though there are
now plenty of women in business, it occurs to me I may have finally found the glass ceiling as a
consultant for lack of suitable mentors—which exponentially becomes a more heavily dominated
male pool the closer you get to the top. You're right, sis: we must work many times harder than
our male colleagues to realize success in corporate America. Anyway, long story short, I called
my favorite recruiter to let him know I would be available at the end of this month when my
contract expires and accepted another offer the following week.
REWIND.
The new offer came w/a raise that puts me at the top of my field; not bad for someone who
started working as an 11 year old babysitter of three kids for 50 cents an hour. Trying to find
my way in a corporate world just opening itself up to taking professional women seriously, I
flipped burgers thru high school, bounced around in college for a few years (waiting tables after
class) before getting married a couple credits shy of a degree—only to return to the workforce,
landing an analyst position as a 30 year old-soon to be single mom having a major meltdown
ten years later.
FAST FORWARD.
So I s/b happy about this latest opportunity and I am truly appreciative the stars lined up in my
favor at a time when so many people are paying their mortgage on credit cards w/double digit
interest rates. But while I remind myself often that I am well paid for my contributions, so are my
male colleagues—many of whom can't/don't honestly hold a candle to what I deliver.
As a child of the sixties, I decided a long time ago that was a fact of life and if I let it make me
bitter I wouldn't be able to a) love a man in my personal life and b) effectively work w/men
critical to success. So I had actually put the whole equal opportunity issue out of my head until
reading our timely note for which I want to thank you: It reminded me that nothing is “wrong
w/me” that a sex change couldn’t fix:) It was such a relief to stop obsessing over what I could
have “done differently” that there were tears of joy in my grief.
Anyway............I nailed the executive summary. Before sending it to the execs I needed to get
"buy in" from my team. So I set up a meeting to get consensus. I started the meeting promptly at
4pm and got about 1/2 way thru the analysis when my male counterpart started fidgeting and
then interrupted me asking me if I could "just scroll down to the bottom line" because, "no
offense" but he needed to leave the office at 5pm sharp. I zipped thru the rest of my carefully
structured scope definition, risk assessment, milestones, next steps, etc etc where upon he
announced "GREAT JOB, kiddo: gotta run.” It was 4:59pm.
Three minutes later on his way out the door, my collegaue stopped by my office to tell me one
more time what a great job I did and how much it was "appreciated." So I asked him if he had a
dinner obligation or something that he needed to leave at 5pm sharp. He said not really, it was
just that his wife didn’t like it when he got home late because it left little time to spend w/their
kids before bedtime. Empathizing w/both my colleague and his wife, I told him I understood and
wished him a nice evening. He grinned, winked and breezed his 6'4" frame out the door.
Ever the ostensible martyr, I stayed laboring over the detail of my summary report another 2.5
hours before sending it out and then headed out the door myself. In reality, it never even
occurred to me how tired I was because I was so intent on "getting it right" as a perfectionist.
Yet it is my male colleague who likely fill the role I aspired to—possibly even taking it w/him to a
new department where he can share w/his beer buddies. But that's politics. Hey, it’s a guy
thing! It hurt, but not bad enough to throw in the towel. I wanted the closure; and I will keep the
(sanitized) artifact in my portfolio for future reference:)
And I keep thinking if I just work hard enough and get it right, I'll get that dream job—
because I'm...scrappy—like Hillary.
Except: I was never able to bring myself to compromise my values for the backstabbing, grand
standing, misleading statements, disingenuous arguments, smearing good people's hard
earned reputations, dismissing significant contributions of competitors w/misrepresentations
and/or half truths—whatever it takes—to get there. We all know plenty of both men and women
who feel the end justifies the means; and really do not care how much blood they leave on the
floor in order to advance themselves.
Since it’s (frankly) not in my nature to retaliate and tear into these women or men, I just work
harder to “Change” the rules: On my own terms. In doing so, I like to think I am setting an
example others will follow. Sometimes, every now then, I even see a pay off—enough to give me
hope I am not alone in my veracity, and keep on trucking.
And then, once in a lifetime, someone comes along and expresses those same values w/such
eloquence that millions of people listen and follow the lead.This person in our lifetime, of
course, is Barack Obama. An idealist, he refuses to fight dirty.
Yes! We are good people w/good intentions who can and will play by God's rules to do
good things!
Even if that means losing the election--which, after Tuesday in Pennsylvania, became a
possibility; despite the fact that Obama will go into the DNC convention w/at least 150 more
delegates than Clinton. Everyone knows the Clinton Machine has already begun twisting arms
behind closed doors even as Hillary and her lovely daughter, Chelsea smile for the cameras. In
fact Hillary is running two campaigns, one above ground, the other below, at the same time
w/her husband moving behind the scenes for the less…palatable stuff, looking for sniper
positions.
But don’t look there, look over here; at Hillary! See how she beams at winning four great big
more delegates than Barack out of 360 delegates at stake in a four state primary! Bring your
daughters to see history in the making. Little girls can grow up to be president! Just don’t look
behind the curtain to see the dark side of ‘whatever it takes’ to make it happen. Don’t mind the
special interests lobbying the news executives to soften their focus on Hillary’s tax returns. Don’
t be distracted by those inspiring speeches making you feel good about your country again.
And above all don’t pay attention to the numbers, they will “sort themselves out,” albeit behind
closed doors by a few hundred super delegates indebted to corporate interests.
Don’t vote for me because I’m a woman. Vote for me because I’m a WOMAN.
Are you confused? Is it any wonder? Do you seek clarity? It’s almost as if, The Clintons, Bill and
Hillary, have somehow managed to bring doublespeak back into vogue even as they espouse
Change. The dynamic duo is fast becoming the two headed monster in my mind. As one who
started this primary season wanting to see either Hillary or Barack in office come January 2009,
I find myself donating money to the Obama campaign almost on a weekly basis these days in
an effort to make the Clintons “go away” once and for all. (I’m even starting to wonder just what
happened to those House Republicans that made them so badly want to exploit the Monica
Lewinsky affair in their insanely focused determination to destroy Bill Clinton.) BTW what ever
happened to those House Republicans, and where are they when you need them?
And now the Florida Republican Governor is concerned about “disenfranchised” voters
in the Democratic primary—ostensibly because they reside in his state?
Doesn’t anyone else smell a rat here? Certainly not the media so busy trying to prove they are
being “fair” to Hillary, they miss the basic questions:
- What standing does a Republican have in advising the DNC how to run its primary?
- Since when are Florida Republicans concerned about “disenfranchising voters”?
- Who is kidding who? How do these people look into the camera w/a straight face?
- Why would anyone accept that one set of rules s/b be re-written in the middle of the
game but not the other?
play, doesn’t it follow that voters in all 50 states are “disenfranchised” when the primary moves
into the inevitable brokered convention??? Talk about having your cake and eating it too!
Look over there at Hillary in Ohio! (Where the Bush administration stole the election in 2004.)
There she is grandstanding her way to the White House, tromping over the “little states”
standing for Change: In values. To wit, notice how Chelsea has replaced Bill at Hillary's side in
a brilliant, carefully crafted move to create the perception Hillary's campaign is about sisterhood.
Make no mistake: In the land of Clintons this election is not about sisterhood; It is about
Hillary's career and the Clinton legacy.
No matter how much blood is left on the floor or what the price tag to the special interest
lobbyists (ie: corporate America) to whom she is indebted, Hillary feels (strongly) entitled to the
job--even if there is a better (wo)man who is much more adept at working effectively to get
things done through the use of words—as opposed to bullets—on good people's terms. That’s
not sisterhood. It’s raw, egotistical ambition for a prize. We’ve had a bellyful. Get it? That’s what
this Change thing is about. Black, White, Yellow, Red: Gay, Bisexual, Short, Tall, Skinny Fat,
Young, Old, Male, Female.
Integrity trumps all this election—note how quickly the republicans got the message
during the primaries?
The Clintons are simply not trustworthy: either together standing side by side or each standing
on their own two feet in two different states at the same time. I’m sorry to call it like I see it, but
we’ve all seen enough to recognize these folks can’t even trust each other, what kind of
arrogance suggests we should trust either of them in a Hillary Clinton administration? Especially
one willing to spend our precious resources (ie: time/money/energy) on playing w/words in an
attempt to confuse the issues, obscure the truth, put forth evocative imagery…say one thing
and do another, shake your head yes and say no all at the same time. Sound familiar? It doesn’
t sound like Change to me. It sounds like same ole same ole duplicitous politics.
Not. This. Time: We will not have yet another election stolen by corporate America. Now
is the time for all good men and women to come to the aid of their country.
The thing is this guy, Barack Obama, understands the end does not always justify the means.
He knows his integrity may cost him the job; he also knows the next president must get there on
the people’s terms, indebted to no one but the people, in order to be effective. Just because he
refuses to fight dirty does not mean he refuses to fight. And people, millions of people, are
counting on Barack Obama to fight the good fight—in the light, above ground, where everyone
can see how it’s done—for that core American value: Do unto others as you would have them
do unto you.
As a born again agnostic, I pray God he can find a way.
Americans know right from wrong; we know truth when we see it and we know the road back to
respect cannot be littered w/Hillary’s broken dishes. But Hillary’s kitchen sink threatens to
destroy anyone in her way, even if that person might be the last chance this country has to get
it right. That is just wrong.
Your beautiful little girls deserve a better role model, dear sister, than Hillary’s trail of dirty
laundry can provide; and as luck would have it, they have one—in you.
 |  |  |  |  |
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